During the wedding ceremony the bride and groom exchange wedding vows. The vows typically represent your commitment to the marriage and each other and sets some expectations that you agree to meet for your partner. An example of this is this phrase from typical traditional wedding vows: “to have and to hold, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health, through good times and bad times, until death do we part”. There are often words to express your religious beliefs and/or words about what marriage represents to each of you.

As the bride and groom you can decide what words to use in your vows. For instance, when my husband and I got married many years ago, I did not want the word “obey” in our vows. Instead we choose to say that we would listen to each other and respect each others opinions.

If you are having trouble coming up with the right words to convey your special message from your heart for your wedding vows, here are some places to look for ideas and examples.

• Check online, do a search for “wedding vows”. This will turn up articles and websites as well as examples that you can use as is or modify to make them your own.
• Check with the person who will be officiating at your wedding. They can often give you examples of vows they often use.
• Consider poetry. Popular poets include Browning, Keats and Gibran to name a few. You can use a favorite poem or write your own.

When writing your vows, it is a good idea for the bride and groom to write your wedding vows together. Although, some couples like to be surprise each other. The most important thing when writing your own vows is that the message comes from your heart. If you keep that in mind while you are working on your vows and keep it short and simple, you may surprise yourself with what beautiful words you come up with.

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